I'm getting paid for this...

I've come to a work day where I have already finished my stories for the day and have nothing planned for the afternoon. I figure that if I keep typing at my desk instead clicking away at random web sites, I have a better chance of keeping it that way. So, here's an unexpected post.

I said I wouldn't go back to hockey, but I must acknowledge Steve Yzerman and his induction to the Hockey Hall of Fame, as well as his consequent ascension to the newest and best member in the entire place -- Gretzky who? The Triple Deke has a couple awesome videos of Stevie Y's heroics but this is one of my personal favorite Yzerman moments, and he didn't even score the goal.

That video still makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Mmmm...I can only imagine how tasty Patrick Roy's tears must be. I'm guessing a flavor orgasm of bacon, red Starburst and a Dairy Queen Reese's Peanut Butter Cup Blizzard with extra peanut butter sauce.

And then, just as I'm feeling good about hockey again, I decide to watch Zack and Miri Make a Porno.

Why? God knows...I've been on a complete movie-watching binge (about one per night for the past two weeks) to build up an upcoming nostalgic post of movie reviews and last night's choice happened to be Zack and Miri.

Don't get me wrong, the movie wasn't completely awful. It was bad, yes, but there were some great laughs from the Seth-Rogen-led cast. The problem is...I was completely unprepared for the movie's opening scene (the horror starts at about 0:40 and ends right at 1:00 even). View at your own risk.

Ghastly, ghastly stuff. It seems my dear Lord Yzerman is playing tricks on me again. Hopefully that video stays up on YouTube long enough for you all to watch it, but I'm sure it will be taken down at some point.

Okay, okay, enough hockey. I swear I'm done until October. If that's not realistic, I'll try and at least keep it to a minimum.

In other news, I'm finishing up my fifth week at the Gloucester Daily Times for my UNH internship. It's been good so far. Not great, but definitely not bad. I like most of the stories I'm writing, but there are a few occasional ones that just shouldn't be in a newspaper. For better or worse, the whole collection of stories I've written can be found here, or just go to www.gloucestertimes.com and search for my name.

Here's a quick list of movies off the top of my head that will be reviewed here soon, listed in a manner that would please someone with obsessive compulsive disorder:

• Fanboys
• Defiance
• Sex Drive
• Body of Lies
  
• Gran Torino
• Seven Pounds
• The Hangover
• Death at a Funeral
• Slumdog Millionaire
• The Taking of Pelham 123
• Vicky Christina Barcelona
• He's Just Not That Into You
  
• Zack and Miri Make a Porno
• Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist

There's a couple more I'm not thinking of, but as you can see...that's a binge. I should probably find a better use of my time.

Hmm...what else is happening in the world today?

• Farrah Fawcett died, as did the hearts of thousands of still-hopeful middle aged men everywhere.
• The NBA draft is tonight at 7 pm, but then again CSPAN's coverage of a riveting session of the House of Representatives might be more exciting.
• Shaq was traded to the Cavs this morning, but the only real intrigue there is what new nickname Shaq will come up with for himself. My money's on "I'm an overhyped NBA player who's past his prime and is really only useful for comic relief." It's long, I know, but I think it'll catch on.
• That Republican Governor Mark Sanford was in Argentina for a week and not actually hiking the Appalachian Trail with his family, providing a gold mine of material for John Stewart.
• Jimmy Fallon beat Tiger Woods in golf -- the Nintendo Wii version, that is -- but he still isn't funny. So sad.
  
• And finally, I've just received word that the second Megan Fox is hot Transformers movie came out yesterday. Looks like my plans are set for the night.

Alright, only an hour of work left to kill before I go downtown run the St. Peter's Fiesta 5K Road Race. Should be pretty cool, especially since I'll have a first person account of it in Saturday's paper. Stay tuned.