Cam's Hat Trick: Spilled.

Game #14: Red Wings 6, Oilers 2

One: I hate not having Center Ice. I love listening to games on the radio, but the NHL seems to have done away with that free feature too. Anyway, so I missed tonight's game and couldn't watch any web feeds because my internet was spotty. All you Wings Tweeters had me salivating for highlights, but I had to settle for this crap:


Hockey's not nearly as fun to watch with only little S, H and G bubbles that pop up after every shot, hit or goal. In fact, it's pretty lame, which totally sucks since this game sounded like it was a lot of fun to watch. What game isn't when the Wings score six goals? Wish I coulda seen it. Instead I had to choose between Yzerman's Wrath against the Capitals or the Bruins-Habs on the local station here. Blah. At least the NHL uploads their game highlights super quickly. Oh, wait. Thanks Gary.

Two: The Bulin Wall crumbles. The Wings were great, as far as I could tell from NHL on the Fly, but most of their goals were pretty weak. Fil's opener was awesome, but both of Cleary's and Homer's goals could have been stopped. All good shots and great, tough plays, but I have to think the score would have been different if a 37-year-old drunk Russian wasn't in goal for the Oil. But I'll take it for 10 wins in 14 games. This team is awesome. Built for June. I can taste it.

Three: This new NHL All-Star Game format idea is awesome. There's always been so much argument over East vs. West, America vs. World, etc. But this puts it up to the players. Name two captains and let them pick who they want on their team. Awesome. While I hate the idea of any Red Wings playing against each other - certainly a possibility - I'm pumped to see the pros pick sides like a street game. The only way they could make it better is if they all put their sticks in a big pile at center ice before the game and picked teams that way. Any bets on who gets picked last? Every on the team will be on All-Star, but I'd say the biggest off-ice assholes might get the shaft. Corey Perry? Chris Pronger? I'd love to see Rosby get the honor and watch his goofy grin fade away like Brady Quinn's on draft day in 2007. No matter what, it'll be awesome. Captain Nick takes Dats or Z first. Calling it now.

Next up: Red Wings vs. Avalanche, Nov. 13 at 7 p.m. I'm sick of hearing about the young, plucky Avs and how they're on the up and up. Let's lay waste to 'em at home and snag another couple points. Go Wings.

Four-in-One Super Trick!

Game #10: Red Wings 2, Flames 1

Game #11: Red Wings 3, Oilers 1
Game #12: Red Wings 4, Canucks 6
Game #13: Red Wings 3, Coyotes 2

One: I know that picture is old, simple and has a ridiculously poor choice of background color, but I was Googling for Red Wings images and found that one. The Wings didn't even play the Ducks and don't until next month, but it made me laugh. Done. Anyway, so I've been away. And the Wings kept playing without me, the bastards. Seems as though they played pretty well though. This is a total waste of an observation. Wait! Lee Stempniak is a dick. Comment salvaged.

Two: Justin Abdelkader. The Afrogator is smart, he works hard and he has so much talent. I love having him on this team. He's a huge reason why the Wings won the first couple games against Calgary and Edmonton, and I think he'll continue to play instead of Hudler even if he's less talented. Hudler just doesn't bring it the same way Abby does. Not every night. Him and Helm, they just outwork you. They are perfect examples of heart over talent. Everyone wants a guy or two like that on their team. The Wings have a roster full of 'em.

Three: Yes, I'm going to be slightly lame and only give three things about four different games. From the highlights, the Wings looked great in the first two games. They played sound defense with some timely scoring and came out with a couple big wins. I would have bet a ton of money that Detroit would drop the Canucks game, seeing as it was their toughest game of the three in Canada and without any rest. If the Wings had enough gas in the third period, they would have swept the whole trip. Oh well. I'm just happy they scored four on Luongo. I don't care what time of year it is; that game alone proves to me he doesn't have what it takes to win the big one. And yes, I can make that kind of outlandish, broad statement about one of the league's best goaltenders despite not seeing a second of his play on Saturday. I stand by my point. He's a quieter, slightly more playoff-successful version of Nabokov. Sure, he won gold at the Olympics last year, but that competition is nothing like the NHL playoffs. One-and-done elimination compared to best-of-seven play. Not even similar. The Canucks are awesome as a team, but there's a reason they have lost to inferior Chicago teams both of the past two years: Luongo. And now that I've said all that he'll probably have 16 shutouts and win the Conn Smythe, judging from my wonderfully prescient Cup prediction based on dislike last year.

Next up: Red Wings vs. Oilers, Nov. 11 at 7:30 p.m. Do we really have to play these guys again? Fiiiine.

Cam's Hat Trick: Winner Winner

Game #9: Red Wings 5, Predators 2

One: Home unis. I absolutely loved the decision to bring back the home whites for this game. If it's up to the team every game, they should just buck the league trend/rules and play in their whites all the time. Not that I have anything against the gorgeous reds on the road, but there's just something awesome about the Wings in white. Reminds me of '97 and Stevie lifting that Cup for the city. Great memories.

Two: Central Division statement. So far, the Wings have dominated the Hawks and the Preds in their only divisional games this year. Those are supposedly the top two teams to challenge the Wings for the Central crown. I don't care if it's early; I love that the Wings are making a statement to their "rivals" and setting the tone for a great year. They have the best talent in the best division in the league. I'd say that puts them above everything else. Put on your white gloves, Cup people. Start engraving.

Three: Bad journalism. I just couldn't let this slide when I'm reporting on small town local news and some person out there gets to cover all the Red Wings games for the Associated Press. Here's the lead from tonight's story, found on ESPN.com:

DETROIT -- Usually a set-up man, Pavel Datsyuk has suddenly turned into quite a goal scorer.

Datsyuk had two goals and an assist to lift the Detroit Red Wings to a 5-2 victory over the Nashville Predators on Saturday night.

Seriously? I know hockey recap writers love to use the one-liners to open up a very plain game story (because they're essentially the same format every single fucking time), but this is unacceptable. Pav is a set-up man, but he's also been one of the flashiest goal scorers in this league for several years. Apparently, this idiot didn't do his/her homework. Shame on you.

Next up: Red Wings at Flames, Nov. 3 at 9:30 p.m. This game, along with the following two games against the Oilers and Canucks, will make for a tricky situation. I'm spending next weekend at Penn State to visit a few friends and catch a football game, so it's possible three games could pass before I get a chance to Hat Trick them all. So expect either a bigger summary next Sunday night or perhaps a four-game combo post following their game against the Coyotes on Nov. 8. Either way, Go Wings.

Cam's Hat Trick: Ugly

Game #8: Red Wings 2, Coyotes 4

One: Goaltending. Ozzie was terrible, like seriously atrocious in the first. I assume he must have some sort of brain injury because that shorthanded goal to put the Coyotes up 3-0 in the first was the worst thing I've ever seen. To his credit, he played well in the second and third periods to keep the Wings in it and give them a chance to pull off the comeback. But his shockingly awful opening frame cost the Wings the game.

Two: Slow start. The Wings were lazy in the first and sorely missed Brian Rafalski on the blueline. Kindl was undressed by Vrbata on the first goal. Keith Yandle picked the corner on the second when the Wings took a stupid penalty. Then no one chased down Lauri Korpikoski (supposedly a man) on the third goal and he put a soft wrister past Ozzie's near pad. All of it could have been avoided with a little more focus in the first, and maybe the Wings could've won this game.

Three: I have nothing else to say. This game sucked. And Lauri Korpikoski needs to change his name. Or leave it for excessive verbal abuse. In fact, I kind of like that second option.

Next up: Red Wings vs. Predators, Oct. 30 at 7 p.m. Let's kick these southern bastards in the teeth. Never liked their existence and never will. Why even bother with hockey in Nashville? Sell 'em to Quebec. Go Wings.

Cam's Hat Trick: Just Ducky

Game #7: Red Wings 5, Ducks 4

One: Pavel Datsyuk. Need I say more?

Two: Deflections. An amazing one by Tomas Holmstrom tied the game at four and a couple great redirections by Zetterberg brought the Wings back into it. I admit that I don't watch many other NHL games and teams, but it would be hard for me to believe anyone else in the NHL is as talented at deflecting and redirecting the puck past goalies as the Wings. The tying tally by Homer through McIlwhatever's legs was awesome. I'll never understand how a guy with such soft touch with his back to the net has absolutely no awareness or skill when facing it.

Three: Standings. Since I didn't see the game and can't offer too much comment on it, I'll take a general look at where this win puts the Wings. First. Yeah. In the league. Only seven games in and they have five wins. Sounds pretty good to me. Pittsburgh and Chicago are there too, but they've played more games without any additional success. Believe me, I'm not getting ahead of myself. It's been seven games. But I've seen enough hockey to know what it means for the Wings to get off to a hot start and get the chemistry rolling. A good October bodes well for June.

Next up: Red Wings vs. Coyotes, Oct. 28 at 7 p.m. Somehow I thought the Wings were playing the Ducks twice in a row. Instead, they get the Coyotes for the second time this month.

Cam's Hat Trick: Dousing the Flames.

Game #6: Red Wings 4, Flames 2

One: The Great Datsyuk. His magic was on full display again tonight, setting up Zetterberg's goal with an amazing backhand pass and then Lidstrom's powerplay tally with a ridiculous display of tic-tac-toe stickwork. It honestly looks like he's fooling around by himself on the ice sometimes, deftly swinging the puck around and tapping it over and under opponents' sticks just for fun. There's no other player like him. I refuse to believe there ever has been or ever will be. (By the way, I must have a copy of that shirt. It's fantastic. Combines my love of The Prestige and the hockey magician himself. Gift ideas anyone? I like the slate color.)

Two: Jiiiimmy Jimmy Jimmah. Have I mentioned how much I like this kid? He's an awesome goalie. He kept the Wings in the game for the first two periods and backstopped the team to a win in the third. I've been trained to have doubts about the Wings' goaltending, except for the magical year with Dom in 2002, and this year is no exception. But I'm coming around fast with Howard in goal. He really steps up and makes big saves when the team needs it. Plus he's an awesome guy. One of those goalies who would never lift the Cup and take it home with him if he had nothing to do with the team that won it. Right? Oh. Damn. Well I'd do it too if I had the chance.

Three: I'd love to say I had three separate thoughts about this game not about Pavel Datsyuk, but I didn't. My mind was slobbering over Dats pretty much the whole time. Well, except for Franzen's awesome goal in the third that he banked off Kiprusoff's head from no angle and the puck rolled down Kipper's shoulder. That was amazing. And Bertuzzi's clincher in the top corner. Sweet. But no, this spot will be for Detroit commercials. I don't live in the area, so I can't usually watch the Wings on FSN-Detroit. But with Center Ice being free for the month of October, I caught the game on God's favorite channel and was able to watch many Michigan commercials. The Pure Michigan ad with Stevie Y chomping on an apple, the new Dr. Rahmani Eye Doctor spot with Lidstrom and my personal favorite: the Red Wings team commercial with Babcock, Osgood, Franzen, and Datsyuk. Hilarious. Almost makes me want to pony up the cash to watch Center Ice and FSN-Detroit all year long.

Next up: Red Wings vs. Ducks, Oct. 23 at 7 p.m. I won't be watching, but I'll have the Hat Trick up by Sunday night once again. This is the second of three match-ups the Wings have against the Ducks this month. Odd scheduling, but I love to hate the Ducks. Let's do it.

Cam's Hat Trick: Badgerbadgerbadgers

Game #5: Red Wings 2, Coyotes 1

One: Kronwall. I only saw the highlights, but if the Wings didn't score in the five-minute overtime period with TWO four-on-three powerplays they deserved to be docked a few points in the standings. Thankfully, some great passing and a nice shot by Kronner ended the game.

Two: Jimmy Howard. The kid's still playing great to start the year. Except for a few softies to the Avalanche, I'm starting to come around to the idea that this guy from Maine is going to be Detroit's starting goalie and the next one to win a Cup for the franchise. His talent is real. I can't wait for him to prove it in April, May and June.

Three: Wisconsin football! Yes, this is a Red Wings recap. No, this is not a Red Wings comment. But I didn't see the Wings game so I have little to say about it, and everyone wins when Ohio State loses. That's not even my rule; it's the word of the Lord.

Next up: Red Wings vs. Flames, Oct. 21 at 7 p.m. Sweet? It's hard to get excited for the Flames. Oh well. Go Wings!

Cam's Hat Trick: Blech. That was ugly.

Game #4: Red Wings 1, Stars 4

One: Turnovers. The Red Wings looked sloppy in every period, making bad passes and not controlling the puck. No one was exempt; even Captain Nick made a no-look pass in the first that was absurdly stupid and almost turned into a goal. I've watched the Wings for many years, and it's pretty rare when they put together a full 60-minute stinker like they did here. Just a lack of concentration all around. Oh, and Ozzie sucked.

Two: Posts. Datsyuk made a great move and dangled one off the crossbar in the first that would have tied the game, and Hudler rang another off the bar in the second. If both those shots go the Wings' way, I think it's a whole different game. It just seemed like the team couldn't generate any momentum, and an early goal before the Stars put the game away would have helped keep them in it.

Three: Road announcers. I don't live in the Detroit area, so I had to watch this game on NHL Network via FSN Southwest. I won't bother to look up the names of the idiots in charge of the play-by-play, but man, they were bad. Whether it was describing a player's actions as "corrupt" when he was called for a penalty or lauding Kari Lehtonen's play when he was, at best, a combination of awful and lucky, these Dallas guys had no clue what they were talking about. Play-by-play is a tough gig, so I can't say I'd do much better on the spot. But I'd venture to say I knew more about hockey when I was 10 years old than these guys do now.

Next up: Red Wings at Coyotes, Oct. 16 at 9 p.m. Rematch of last year's playoff series. Should be a good one. I won't be watching because I'm going to watch Michigan play UNH in what should be an awesome college hockey game, but I'll have the Hat Trick up by Sunday night. Go Wings!

Cam's Hat Trick: I hate you, Brandon Yip

Game #3: Red Wings 4, Avalanche 5

One: Kirk Maltby. Yep, the guy didn't play in this game. But for any longtime Red Wings fan, you know he deserves some recognition on the night he finally hangs up his skates. He retired this afternoon to take a scouting job with the team instead of play another year mostly in the minors. It's too bad, but he's just not good enough to make the roster anymore. The grinders made in his image are younger, faster, better. But that doesn't mean we don't all remember that Sports Illustrated cover in 1997, that back-and-forth goal with Joey Kocur against Philly in those '97 Finals, or the countless penalties he killed. It's sad to see him retire, but it was time. Thanks for everything, Malts. You were awesome.

Two: Pavel Datsyuk and Henrik Zetterberg. These guys are fucking magic together. Prepare for me to slobber over them way too many times this season. Whenever they're on the ice I'm ready for a goal. Their beauty in the second period was too easy. There's no other duo in the NHL that is as in sync as the Euro Twins. If Hank wasn't married to ungodly gorgeous Emma Andersson and Dats wasn't with his wife, whoever she is, I swear these two would be as good together as George and Mary Bailey.

Three: Doug Janik. Ugh. Please go away. Damn you, Rafalski's knee. I don't know if I can stand extended time with this guy on the ice. It's like Lilja, but worse.

Next up: Red Wings at Stars, Oct. 14 at 8:30 p.m. This game is on NHL Network, which makes me happy because that makes two nights this week Red Wing nights.

On a side note, I love watching a sport that gets over in two and a half hours with limited commercials. Not any of this all-afternoon football junk or forever-and-a-day playoff baseball. Exactly why hockey is my favorite.

Cam's Hat Trick: Get used to it, Chicago

Game #2: Red Wings 3, Blackhawks 2

One: Second-line scoring. Valtteri Filppula had two goals and Goon Bertuzzi had another as the Wings flew past the Hawks to ruin their opening night and their Stanley Cup banner ceremony. Filppula needs to step up and have a productive, healthy year to keep the Wings in it until the end and a game like this is a good start. His winner was a fluky one, but I'll take it. Nice way to jump on Chicago early in the season and grab two quick wins on opening weekend.

Two: Oh, Marty Turco. I loved you so much as the championship-winning goalie for the Michigan Wolverines back in their late-90s glory days and I was able to not hate you on the Stars, but this new deal you've got with the Hawks has soured me. Well, in fact it's made me very happy in that you can't stop any piece of black rubber sent from the stick of a Red Wings player (Turco is something like 1-2,000 against the Wings all-time), but I'm conflicted in that it makes me a teensy bit sad to see you suffer. But Wings over Wolverines, so I must root for your demise. Thank you for signing with the Blackhawks. The whole Wings faithful is forever grateful.

Three: Bittersweet Chicagoans. I love that the Wings ruined their home opener and the banner raising ceremony with a hard-fought victory. Enjoy that banner while you can, Hawks fans. You're not getting another this year. I'm not going to say it'll be another 49 years, but you have nothing close to what it takes to repeat in this league. Here starts your slow painful ride back to second place in the Central, where you belong.

Next up: Red Wings vs. Avalanche, Oct. 12 at 7 p.m. Back to the old rivalry. Another good one on tap and hopefully the first game of the season that I'll get to watch live. Let's get Jimmy another shutout! Yes, I realize I just jinxed it and the Avs will probably score a minute in, but whatever. Go Wings.

New Wings, New Ways

It's been a while since the Detroit Red Wings have held a strong presence on this blog, and that just doesn't sit well with me.

See, I have two followings of this blog (both of which are astronomically small): One that loves the Red Wings and wants to read endless words about their awesomeness, and one that cares nothing about the Red Wings but happens to like me as a person and wants to read my writing or what's going on in my life.

So, I've always tried to do a little of both to keep both camps happy (again, these camps barely need to split a single tent) but recently, I've strayed away from the Red Wings stuff. I don't put as much effort into writing about them as I used to, and my posts often come out quite inferior to much of the A2Ys and Triple Dekes and Snipe Snipe, Dangle Dangles of the Wings blogosphere.

I have always wanted to do something consistent throughout the season, but time commitments and laziness have always thrown a wrench into my plans. This year though, I think I have it.

Cam's Hat Trick.

It will be short, it will be sweet, it will follow every Red Wings game. And it won't affect how much I blog about other subjects, although that doesn't say a whole lot. Anyway, I'll still be trying to write about both.

Now, I can't see into the future and promise that I will hit all 82 regular season games, but I'm going to try. So if you want some quick thoughts, quirky observations or completely biased reviews, I will have three following each game. Even on nights when I can't watch, I'll bring you a fresh edition of Cam's Hat Trick based on what I read and saw on the highlight reels.

That's all I will promise for now, as the idea just came to me. It's really just a watered down version of the Triple Deke's game recaps It's going to be awesome. And with that, here we go:

Game #1: Red Wings 4, Ducks 0

One: Pavel Datsyuk getting in a fight with Corey Perry was awesome. My favorite player holding his own against one of my least favorite players in the league...just beautiful to watch. I still can't believe The Great Datsyuk finally decided to drop the gloves and I wasn't there to catch it live. But I watched it many times on replay, and I'm glad to see Dats got some punches in. The Dangle Master also had a great deflection goal and an assist before he completed the Gordie Howe Hat Trick with this fight in the second period. It's an awesome way to start the season, and it gets him the first nod in the opening edition of Cam's Hat Trick.


Two: Mike Modano scores a goal on his first shot as a Wing. A fluttering puck that floated past Jonas Hiller isn't anything to get excited about, but his presence was clearly felt. The guy is excited, the guy is motivated, the guy looks fuckin' good in red. I've been on the Mo2Motown bandwagon since the first whisper rumors emerged, and I'm so psyched to see one of my favorite former non-Wings finishing his career with the greatest franchise in the world. Very happy to see he had a good game and picked up his first goal tonight.


Three: Jimmy Howard stopped every puck that came his way and kicked off his sophomore season with a great effort. Sure, it was only 21 shots and it was the Ducks, but he showed no jitters and made every play he had to make. I really like this young kid, even if he's a former Maine Black Bear. This strong opening win will be good for his confidence and I hope he can keep it going tomorrow night against the hated 'Hawks. Speaking of which...

Next up: Red Wings at Blackhawks, Oct. 9. at 8:30 p.m. We have to watch those bastards raise their Cup banner, but hopefully we can spoil their fun and take another step toward reclaiming the division crown.

It's over.

Another year gone. This one doesn't hurt like last year, but knowing that three of the remaining four teams will, or probably will, be the Sharks, Hawks and Pens is truly disturbing. I don't really want to talk about it. If you care about the Wings, you know it all anyway. See you in October.

Total domination. Wings 7, Sharks 1.

I saw almost none of this game, except the Sharks' lone goal and Mule's fourth and final tally. I had one of those days, you know the ones where everything goes right from start to finish? It was amazing. And at about 9:15 tonight, I'm happy and thinking it wouldn't even matter if the Wings head home for the summer. Then I turn the game on and it's 6-0. The day gets better.

I have nothing to say about this game because I hardly saw any of it. But what I know is Babcock wanted to win one game after Tuesday's heartbreak. He did it. Tonight, he'll say the same thing again. One game. Win Saturday. Nothing else matters. Let's take this momentum to California and bring the series back to Detroit. It's not over yet. Go Wings.

Blame me. Wings lose again.

I turn on the Wings game with 13:33 left in the third. Thornton scored with 13:18 left. Then some stupid rookie got his first goal ever when Jimmy was caught cheating and more bullshit ensued in overtime. Blame it all on me. I started recapping on the blog right when this round started and so far I'm battin' a thousand for Wings games to end with a 4-3 loss to the Sharks. Tonight was especially suspicious because the Wings looked to have the game in hand when I turned it on, then all of sudden it was over and the Winged Wheels are deflating rapidly. Our season can't end this way.

I don't really know what to say. I watched very little of the game but felt quite unsatisfied with what I saw. The Wings didn't play well with the lead and the officials took away two minutes of crucial kick-ass time at the end by calling a stupid penalty on Holmstrom. In overtime, I was too anxious and worried and freaking the fuck out to even notice how the Wings played. Then the Sharks scored and now I'm here typing out my feelings of frustration to whatever audience is left of the blog.

I can't stand a sweep. I really can't. Not to the Sharks. Not to these Sharks. The Colorado fucking Avalanche won two games against these Sharks just weeks ago. I really really really don't want to see it end this way on Thursday. Let's go Wings. Win Thursday. Win game four. Then we'll think about game five. No need to think ahead; no need to worry about four straight right now. It's one at a time. We can take these Sharks one at a time.

It's not over yet. Must. Keep. Telling. Myself. That. Pray to God for a Red Sox 2004. No fetal positions yet, no swearing off all things hockey. Not yet. Not yet not yet not yet. I'm not ready for the Wings to go home for the summer. Step it up Wings. If there's any team that could choke away four straight in the playoffs, it's these Sharks. Let's do this. Go Wings.

No time to panic: Wings 3, Sharks 4

Another game played well, another game lost. Two goals from that stupid streaking Pavelski, a ton of ridiculous penalties and game two ended exactly as game one. Wings 3, Sharks 4.

I wasn't watching as closely in the third period, but every time I looked up the Wings were on the penalty kill. I did some research afterward (opened my computer and clicked on the NHL.com box score) to find these numbers staring at me hard in the face:

Detroit penalties: 10. San Jose penalties 4. Detroit third-period penalties: 5. San Jose third-period penalties: 2.

OK. Maybe the 2007 Anaheim Ducks get five penalties in the third period, but we're talking about the Detroit Red Wings here. There's no referee in the world who can legitimately call five penalties on God's sacred franchise in a single period. The Wings don't have players on their team that take penalties, other than Bertuzzi. And since the 'Tuz didn't take allll the penalties, I have to assume most of the calls were crap. And since San Jose scored two goals in the third (both of which were annoying as all hell), I'm going to chalk this loss up to the officiating once again.

Call it poor logic if you want, but I don't see any other way to describe both games one and two. "The Sharks are just a better team" is a laughable rebuttal. That's like saying the Penguins deserved to win the Cup last June. Fuhgettaboutit.

Game three is Tuesday in Detroit. The Wings win and they're back in it; the Wings lose and it's all but over. The Triple Deke jinxed us tweeted earlier today that Babcock's Wings have never faced an 0-2 or 1-3 hole in a playoff series. Well they're in deep now. It's win four out of the next five or go home to book an early tee time. I love golf but I don't like the sound of that. Let's do this. See you Tuesday. Go Wings.

Another attempt to get back on the horse...

This will be my fourth post of the year, and it comes on April 30. That's one post per month. Pretty pathetic; almost as bad as my lack of running in 2010. But I think I'm going to try and re-enter the blogosphere one more time, and hopefully, I'll stick to it with recaps of the Wings' playoff games from now on. For now, I'll start with game one of round two: Wings 3, Sharks 4.

I literally can't believe how much bullshit the Wings had to put up with in this game and still almost tied it to force overtime. First, they start strong and outplay San Jose for the game's initial eight minutes. Then, the referees call a very weak slashing call on Filppula (he didn't even break the damn guy's stick!) and thus began the Sharks' scoring barrage. One, two, three and it was 3-0 San Jose just that fast. The first was a good shot on the powerplay by the suddenly surface-of-the-sun hot Joe Pavelski (who everyone is having such a good time calling "The Big Pavelski" -- We get it. The Big Lebowski except with Pavelski. Hilarious. Go snip your brainstem.) and then the Wings blow coverage in front of the net on Heatley's goal and then Setoguchi has a puck bounce right to him and he dumps it in the open net. Amazing series of events that all started with a crappy call that a referee shouldn't make in the playoffs. How in the world can a guy of Filppula's soft hands and moisturized hair slash someone hard enough for a penalty? I just don't see it.

Anyway, Cleary comes back with an easy one. Then the Wings outplay the Sharks for the next 20 minutes and Franzen snipes a beauty. But then the Mule gets slashed in the face, necessitating more than a few stitches and much bloodshed, and the man gets called for a tripping penalty. WAIT, wait wait. I'm sorry. I was wrong. I did some research, and apparently the NHL has changed the definition of a tripping penalty.

Straight from Lil' Gary's Book o' Rules:

• "Tripping: When a player trips another player with his stick or when a player aggressively lodges his face into another player's stick and forces the pansy him to fall down due to the strength of his fantastic skin."

In that case, Franzen was guilty. But seriously, instead of the Wings having a legitimate four-minute powerplay to end the period, the Sharks get a powerplay that soon becomes a 5-on-3 when that sneaky little Diving Shark (yes, it's a new breed) Setoguchi gets whacked in the chest by Filppula and goes down in perfect Rosby form for another penalty on the Wings. I usually don't argue high-sticking calls because they are so damn inarguable, but multiple replays showed Fil's stick never touching Setoguchi's face at all. Not even an inch. Then Pavelski rolls another strike down the center of Howard's lane (Ha ha ha, another Big Pavelski joke. I hate myself) and the Sharks are back up two at the start of the third. Raffy get's us back in it after a beautiful feed from my boy Datsyuk and then the Sharks hang on for a crapshoot game one victory.

I hated it, I was frustrated for the game entirety, and I'm not going to be able to sleep for a while tonight. But I have to agree with what Mr. Triple Deke tweeted after this one wrapped up: "Not worried either. Still love this matchup."

He's right. The Wings outplayed the Sharks for almost the entire game (not vastly outplayed, but outplayed nonetheless) on the road, less than two days after the end of a tough seven-game series, and still only lost by one thanks to some bullshit from the refs. I have to think that's a good sign somehow about this matchup. The Sharks aren't playoff tested. The Wings are. They're both really talented, but the Wings have the drive. I still like the Wings a lot in this one. Let's do it again in game two.

Oh, and the best part about game two on Sunday? Not on NBC, not in the afternoon. Night game in the Shark Tank. Let's tie it up boys. Go Wings.

Return to Blogging: Wings-Flames Live Coverage

It's been two months. I have no excuses; most of my thoughts about hockey have been better expressed through 140 characters than in long form here. Anyway, now I'm on spring break and I have little to do over the next week other than celebrate my 22nd birthday on St. Patrick's Day and lie around my house. So, since this game with the Flames is huge (regular-season-wise), I thought I'd check back into the blogging hotel for a night and see what my lazy brain comes up with. Enjoy.

Detroit Red Wings at Calgary Flames

First Period

• Oh, half a minute in and Holmstrom skates off with a knee injury. I'm regretting this already.
• It gets better! Wings turnover results in a Flames goal less than two minutes in annnd we're down 1-0. Jeez, what a way to start the biggest game of the regular season so far. The fact that I typed that sentence combined with my Red Wings fandom verbs my noun in ways I can't even comprehend. When was the last time a regular season game actually mattered for the Red Wings? March 26, 1997 is the last one that comes to mind, and even that one was just bragging rights.
• Lidstrom giveaway down low almost ends in a goal if not for save by Rookie Goaltender. Who is this team?
• I like the looks of the new Cleary-Filapoola (Babcock pronunciation) - Zetterberg line. Talented, hard-working. If only they could put the puck in the net.
• Shorthanded two-on-one and no goal. Surprised? Not me. Not this year.
• Random deviation: The incredibly messed up episode of South Park with Kenny and his "cheesing" addiction is on. I love the show, but this one was just weird. Cartman posing as the Anne Frank for cats and Kenny high on cat urine for the whole episode? Just...weird. The new one where Matt and Trey take on Tiger Woods (airs on Wednesday) looks pretty interesting though. Could be hilarious if it doesn't get too crazy like the one they did about Britney Spears a while back. Anyway, back to the game.
  
• This play-by-play on FSN-Detroit is so boring. I mean it's a one-goal first period, but Mickey is talking...so slow. He's using....silence as...a filler. Maybe that's why I'm watching the game on my computer, live-blogging and glancing at the TV all at the same time. Pick it up in the second, Mick, please.
• End of the period, still down 1-0. A few chances from the Wings, but mostly just a back and forth period with an early goal scored off a turnover. Maltby's pretty bad as an announcer, by the way, but then again so is Matthew Barnaby and he got a job at ESPN. Nevermind, I don't care. Bring on period two.
  

Second Period

• Very little happening. Random thought: Does anyone else think that if the Wings had the money/means to trade for huge talents like Olli Jokinen and Jay Bouwmeester that they'd be thriving and leading the league in just about everything? The Wings develop players better than any other team. I'm not biased or anything.
• Nice, retaliatory play to check Holmstrom in the back of the head for...being Holmstrom. The drunk Canadian crowd loved it though.
• Where did this Kiprusoff come from? I thought he was still all high and mighty about playing for Finland and giving up a ton of goals to U.S.-born players. I guess he likes Calgary better. Seems like the same place to me. Cold. North. Not America. Yeah. Same place.
  
• Random deviation #2: Love that I have an automatic mute button on my MacBook: it's perfect for when that still-retarded Fillet-O-Fish commercial comes on and I don't have to have that song stuck in my head for hours. Thanks, Apple; I'm sure that was what you were thinking when you designed it.
• Yeah Mickey, Drew Miller for the Vezina this year. And I thought Murph was the lovable idiot on this telecast. Jeez I'm critical tonight. Perhaps it's just boredom. Or an overload of ice cream. Both? Nevermind.
  
• J-Will rings an easy goal off the post. Ugh. He's a perfect fit as Samuelsson's replacement.
• Nice save, Jimmy Howard. I tell ya this kid better win the Calder this year after all the crap he's been through in the minors. He's proven his worth.
  
• Do the Red Wings defensemen know they're playing in Calgary and not at the Joe? Shoot the puck at the net, not the boards, guys. They aren't the same up here in Canada, eh.
• Score. Power play. Let's capitalize.
• Bullshit. Terrible call. That's called good defense on a breakaway. Wait. How the hell is that a penalty shot? Dear God. Please Jimmy, please....THANK You. Nice save. Let's get this power play going again.
• Tie game! What a shot by Datsyuk. Honest to God I'll never get tired of watching that man play hockey. Sure, Yzerman will go down in history as my favorite hockey player of all time, but Datsyuk is the best to watch. His talent is unmatched. I feel like I should go put on his jersey. But then it would cover my "Got Yzerman?" shirt. A conundrum only a Red Wings fan would have.
  
• Oh, the period's over. 1-1 and headed to the third for eighth in the West. Let's do it.

Third Period

• The Wings have come out with a lot of fire to start this period. They better keep it up and take the lead instead of let it die out and lose it in the final minutes.
• Crap. Unavoidable four-minute power play for the Flames. Pleeease kill it.
• Whew. What a kill. I was going to interrupt it a couple times but didn't want to jinx it. Big penalty kill. Won't matter though if the Wings can't score and put the pressure on the home team.
• Son of a...Kronwall rings another post. Nice move though. Datsyuk probably would've just chipped it calmly over Kipper for the goal like this beauty, but he's a hockey deity. Can't blame Kronwall for simply being good and not perfect.
  
• Are the Red Wings really going to play a full season with Todd Bertuzzi on their roster? It's still hard to believe and the signing happened last summer...
• Five minutes to go and I'm dreading overtime or a shootout. Yeah, they're fun to watch, but Detroit has 12 OT or shootout losses this year. Not sure why, but they can't close the deal when the extra point is on the line. End it in regulation, please.
• That's what I'm talking about! 2-1 Wings after another ho-hum (amazing) deflection goal by Holmstrom in front of the net and only a minute and change remaining in the game. That's exactly what the Wings need to take this game. Hold on Jimmy!
• Nice save Jimmy! 14 seconds to play. The kid has really been huge and if the Wings make the playoffs (never thought I'd ever think those words), I say the spot is his to lose.
• Awesome comeback. 2-1 Wings final score. Big win to move three points up on Calgary and one behind Nashville with the stretch run still to come. Yes, yes and yes.

Post Game Thoughts

• Tight game. Playoff-type game. And the Wings won it with solid goaltending, good defense, a clutch penalty kill, and a timely even-strength goal. That sounds more like the championship-caliber Wings I've been watching for years.
• Four days off before what should be an easy win against Edmonton might be a bit of a buzzkill after the momentum generated from a big game like tonight, but I think it'll be good for the team. Good for rest, good for focus, good overall. I like the Wings' chances after tonight. They look determined.

I have nothing else to add. This was...fun? Yeah, fun. Perhaps I'll be back while I'm still on break, but don't count on it. I'm sure by now you've all deleted me from your bookmarks anyway. I don't blame you. I blame Sidney Rosby. He's the reason for all the world's problems.

Five Reasons the Hawks Won't Win the Stanley Cup

I stirred myself up a bit re-reading my blog today (hey, somebody has to keep the page view numbers up) and felt an urge to write again. I know I said "wake me in April" just yesterday about the NHL, but I've got a couple more stones to throw. The league's "best" team right now is the Chicago Blackhawks and all the hockey pundits are smiling as if they've just let loose a huge fart and blamed it successfully on someone else -- they called it. They all said the Wings would be too tired, too old, too every-excuse-in-the-book to compete for the Central Division again this season and the fresh new Hawks would reign. Well, statistics and standings say those smug, so-called experts are right on the money. I say they're still wrong.

If the Blackhawks hold on to win the first non-Detroit Central Division title in many years -- still a big 'if' in my book -- there's a huge mountain to climb afterward that they have no chance to summit: Lord Stanley's Cup. These Blackhawks won't win it. Here's why.

• Cristobal Huet. He's never shown he can be counted on in the playoffs and his stats this season are ridiculously misleading. He has the seventh-best GAA in the league at 2.17, but that's all Duncan Keith and Brent Seabrook's doing. The better stat to look at is his 26th-best .908 save percentage. That's not going to get any better this year and it'll get worse in the playoffs. Huet is a headcase and he can't bail out his defense when they make a mistake. Goaltending is the most important piece of the puzzle in a Cup run, and the Hawks don't have it.

• Marian Hossa. Sounds like sour grapes, doesn't it? Well, I won't deny that seeing him in a Hawk uniform or a Hawk headline makes me cringe a bit, but the motivation to have him on this list is warranted. Hossa was a no-show in last year's playoffs for the mighty Wings. He hid behind Zetterberg and Datsyuk and Franzen, and he'll do the same behind Toews and Kane and Sharp. The Hawks will count on him for points and he won't produce. He's not a clutch player; I learned that much last year when he disappeared in the two biggest games of his life (games six and seven of last year's finals). He's driving himself crazy trying to coast his way to a Cup, but a championship is earned (except of course in the Penguins' case). Hossa's lackadaisical playoff play will sink the Hawks.

• Joel Quenneville. The guy's got a great resume, good rapport with his players and one helluva mustache, but that won't get you sippin' out of Stanley. Here's an interesting comparison for you. Quenneville-coached teams in the playoffs since 1996 have won nine series -- he beat the Kings, Coyotes, Sharks, Stars, Blackhawks, Stars, Wild, Flames, and Canucks. Quenneville-coached teams in the playoffs since 1996 have lost 10 series -- he faltered against Detroit, Detroit, Dallas, San Jose, Colorado, Detroit, Vancouver, Anaheim, Detroit and Detroit. Six of the teams he lost to went on to win Stanley Cups. None of the teams he's defeated strikes me as a legitimate contender. Translation: he can't win the big one. He's hockey's Marty Schottenheimer; he'll win plenty of games for ya and getcha into the playoffs, but don't plan on raising any banners the following season.
• Jonathan Toews. One of the few players on the Hawks that I like and respect, Toews is a great player and has many great years ahead of him. But he's 21 years old and he'll be called upon to lead his team to a championship. Somehow, I don't see that ridiculous outcome happening two years in a row. Youth is tricky to judge, but in almost all cases, the veteran teams win out. I hope that bodes well for the Wings, but even if it doesn't, I can see other teams stepping in to level the chances of Toews and his baby Hawks.

• Common sense and experience. A team two years removed from the league basement doesn't win a Stanley Cup. Maybe a Super Bowl or an NBA title, but not a Stanley Cup. The road is too long, too tough, too much for a bunch of young punks to break through that quickly. And they are a group of young punks: the only guy on their roster with his name on the Cup is John Madden, the Eastern-Conference version of Kris Draper.

It all adds up to one thing: they're just not there yet. Chicago hasn't won a Stanley Cup since 1961 -- that's 48 years for you English majors out there -- and that drought will stay dry for another season. As I see it, they'll be lucky to make it back to the conference finals. Go Wings.

Twenty Ten

Happy New Year. It's been more than a month since my last post and there's no legitimate reason why. I've been writing constantly, though mostly in journal/grad-school essay form, and I've had a ridiculous amount of time on my hands during my 45-day winter break from school that ends in two weeks, but I haven't touched the blog and rarely read others anymore. I haven't read the Chief in months and I never make the usual trip down the blogroll to see what others are saying about the Red Wings' season anymore. (I still read the Triple Deke, but who doesn't? Those guys not only write hilarious and consistent posts, but now they're providing video entertainment too. A Blogger's Gold Standard, I say). Perhaps it's shame from not ever writing about the Wings anymore, but mostly it's just the fact that I'm getting a little sick of the NHL. Not hockey, not the Red Wings, not Datsyuk and Zetterberg and Lidstrom and Draper and all my favorites, but the NHL. I'm sick of everyone's infatuation with Crosby and Ovechkin. I'm sick of Pierre McGuire and NHL on NBC. I'm sick of everyone crowning the Blackhawks and the Sharks already. I'm sick of the injuries and call-ups the Wings are forced to use day in and day out. I'm sick of the Avalanche doing well despite a team no one thought could compete prior to the season. This season is just annoying. So, since it irritates me, it's hard to follow it the same way I usually do. Go Wings as usual, but with the exception of the Olympics, I say don't wake me til April.

Now that we have that squared away, I'll start by addressing the new year. It's 2010. That's twenty-ten or two-thousand-and-ten. I have no idea what I'll be doing in four months time. That prospect is slightly terrifying, but I'm 21 years old (22 come St. Patty's Day) and need not worry about the future just yet. I figure if I read enough books, write enough stories and make the most of my days, I'll find a way to make ends meet and enjoy my time doing it. Jobs are scarce, graduates are panicking. I could certainly fall right in line with that fear -- and I've had bouts of that thinking just about every day I've been home this winter -- but I'm going to make my main goal of 2010 to stay calm, take what comes my way and live. Just live. Sounds like something a hairy happy hippie might say, man, but that doesn't mean I'm going to throw my best shirts in a bowl of tie-dye and groove to the Dead's greatest hits. No; it's just a choice. I figure I won't have too many other periods of life where things are this good or this free, so why not just sit back and enjoy it.

Quick hits on some topics that have passed me by in my blogging absence:

• The whole Tiger Woods situation surprised me. I'll admit it: the guy's an idiot for what he did. But it changes nothing about why I idolized him, why I still do. He plays golf really, really well, and I admire that. I love the game and I love watching him play it with unmatched skill. Maybe some will say that's ignorant, but I never really planned on taking notes about relationships or character from professional athletes. Seems like a road with more bad endings than good ones.
  
• Pete Carroll's decision to leave USC for the NFL's Seahawks is a puzzling one. I really liked Carroll at USC and I don't understand his motive for leaving. Perhaps he'd like to feel what it's like to screw up a football program again rather than rebuild a contender.
• The Colts were stupid to rest their starters and lose their last two games. A team's objective is to win games at any cost. I think it's stupid for a coach to ever think otherwise; it doesn't matter what you've wrapped up already. You play to win the game. It's that simple. You don't play for the Super Bowl. You play to win every down, every minute, every quarter, every game. That's the whole idea. When you lose sight of that by resting guys who don't need resting, you send the wrong message.
  

I'm all out of words, ideas and rants for the evening. I might be back soon or I might be gone another month. Hard to say without any real inclination of what each day will bring. I've resolved to read 100 books this year and I've already finished three through the first 10 days, but it'd be nice to get some suggestions in the comments for some others if you feel so inclined. Goodnight.

What the hell is going on?

This blog is basically toast. It should get back up to par over Christmas break when I get some time to write write write but it's been out of touch all semester. Who are the Red Wings even starting nowadays? I got Datsyuk, Zetterberg, Lidstrom, an 80-year-old man posing as Tomas Holmstrom, four Yzerman cutouts for intimidation, and a boxboy from Best Buy that loses fights and goes by the name of May. And who the hell is Drew Miller? I can't remember a time where I had absolutely no clue who a player was that was in the Red Wings organization, but Drew Miller fits that bill. I read his name on one of The Triple Deke's latest recaps so he must be real, but as far as I'm concerned he still pitches for the Tigers and was never traded to the Marlins.

Seriously, what's happening with the NHL right now? The Wings have won 13 games and lost 13 games and have about 13 injured players that are making about 13 million bucks apiece. I'm more confident in Jimmy Howard than I am in Chris Osgood, which isn't saying much but considering I thought of Jimmy Howard as more of an aborted fetus than a hockey player before the season started, I'm pretty surprised that he's risen to the occasion so quickly. I'm annoyed that the Hawks are doing so well, Hossa included, but since goaltending and coaching are two of the most important aspects of playoff hockey, I see a first-round choke job in their future. At least last year they had no expectations. This year, they'll be sure to keep Hossa on the personal train of epic life decision failures.

I'll end this ridiculously random post that does nothing but continue to show this blog as the old senile bastard of Red Wings blogs with a simple prediction that the Wings finish eighth in the conference and lead a 16-0 charge to Stanley's silver chalice. Hooah, what a season it will be. Go Detroit Cougars! Falcons! Red Wings!